My Friend Joshua (Part 3)

If you have missed either installment of this series, you will want to read it here (Part 1, Part 2).

The Hospital

I was well into my third year at college and my friend Joshua started looking worse and worse.

He looked to be burdened.  While I still saw him around campus, hanging with different groups of friends, he did not look well. I could see him deteriorating before my eyes and I still had no idea what was making him sick, nor would he admit it.

I only knew what the rumors were saying.  I was no longer laughing at the jokes, but I wasn't stopping them either.

He disappeared from school and I heard that he was in the hospital.  People were now laughing about that!  Obviously other students were exploring their freedoms as I had been, because I don't remember any parent ever suggesting it was okay to laugh about somebody's misfortunes.  Or to suggest that kicking them when they were down was okay. This was really starting to bother me.

I found out which hospital Joshua was at and went one afternoon.  I felt he needed some support but I didn't even know if I would be able to see him.  I asked the front desk which room Joshua was in.

Getting ready to head off to find his room, I recognized a few students from college in the lobby.  I wondered if they were here to see Joshua too.

One of them came up to me and said "Hey!  I've seen you on campus with Joshua.  Are you here to see him?".

Writing what he asked does not explain how he asked it.

I could tell from the question that he wasn't happy about Joshua. He wasn't asking to see if he could join me.  He wasn't a friend of Joshua.

This is when I really started to wonder what Joshua did to receive all of the resentment.

I wish I could go back in time to change what I said, to stand up for somebody who needed to be defended.  But I was still exploring.  I was still figuring out who I was.

I responded, "Oh no!  I'm here to see my grandpa who just came out of surgery.".

The guy wished my grandpa well and we said good-bye. I knew he wouldn't have said the same thing about Joshua.

I found my friend Joshua's room.  I walked in and I could see all of the machines monitoring him, some hooked up to his body. There was discoloration of his face and arms, as if he had been on the receiving end of a violent assault. I could see he was weak.

He was the sickest person I had ever seen.

He looked up and saw me.  His face broke into a big smile and he asked me how I was doing. He was asking about me!  With that same genuine 'nothing else matters in the world' attitude that I knew him so well for.

I immediately thought of how I had been ashamed to admit I was visiting him.  In fact, I had JUST lied about visiting him.

I thought of all those times I laughed at the jokes being flung around at his expense.  I never once stopped the jokes, defended him or stopped the lies from continuing.

And yet he was always there for me, encouraging me to do the right thing when I needed that encouragement or preventing things from getting really ugly at that party where I lost control.

What type of friend was I?!

The emotions hit me like a tidal wave and I couldn't stop them.  I turned my face from him so he couldn't see what I was feeling.

I didn't deserve his smile.  I didn't deserve his friendship. He didn't deserve the sickness that was obviously destroying him.

And then I felt his arms around me and him telling me everything was okay.

His Death

It wasn't long after that visit, that I heard my friend Joshua had passed on.

I wish I could tell you the "feel good story" that he pulled through and walked out of the hospital.

I wish I could tell you that upon news of his death, compassion finally overcame all the students who used to call him friend and that they stepped forward to honor him in his afterlife.

Instead, the jokers at school had more material to work from. I didn't hide my disdain at their jokes and they quickly moved on to other more receptive audiences.

I still didn't have any idea what had killed him.  And I couldn't bring myself to go to his funeral or visit his family, people I had never met.

I had never been to a funeral and I didn't feel worthy to be at Joshua's.

What I didn't know at the time, was that his death wasn't the end of the story. There was so much more to who Joshua was.  It was a random occurrence, that took place roughly 9 years later, which would start to unravel the mystery of Joshua.

It was then that the truth came out.



***** To Be Continued *****


In the conclusion to the Series, we find out what really happened to Joshua and the truth surrounding his death.


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